1L

"1L"

So much is wrapped up in that title. So much honor, so much struggle, so much promise. As I sit here trying to prepare for tomorrow my first day of class, I feel as if I have moved to the eye of the storm. I am now one with the swirl of emotion and conflicting thoughts in my head. I have made my peace, its quieter. It's almost surreal I can feel everything moving around me so fast, my life has changed so much and will continue to change..and here I am just sitting. Being. 1L

It would be cliche to say I am about to take a big step tomorrow, my first class, what to expect? I honestly feel as if my entire life has led me here to this one point. All the things I have been through have become a giant confluence of forces shaping, molding, and directing me to this moment. This is my destiny, my calling, and its strange to think about it now. So many things I wanted to do as a child. So many things that were pushed my way as a teenager. So many chances to throw it away or pass it up as a Young Adult. But here I am, and I know, like I know up from down, that this is where I should be. Where I am supposed to be. Where I was always going to end up.

GOD, Destiny, Tao, or the Force...whatever it is, it knew I was heading here, and I think if I'm honest I knew it as well. I can not be worried, I've been through too much already. Will it be hard? Of course. Will it be taxing? Yes. Will it be to much for me? Not on your life. After pledging, I fully know my physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual breaking point...this will not be near it. This is a matter of self-control, and will. I have both. This will not be easy but this will not be hard, just another challenge. Another chance to prove myself.

I actually look forward to this now. This summer my boss and myself were discussing motivation. More specifically why some Black men make it past there circumstances and others don't. He said something that stuck with me "They don't know their 'WHY'. They know 'WHAT' they want, they know 'HOW' to get there, but they don't have the 'WHY'" What is my WHY? It's like 7th grade again. Y=??

Y=U+G. That is to say "Why is you plus your goals." So what is my Why? Why am I here?

Because I have spent my life watching my family and their service to others. The simple acts of kindness that defines both my parents and grandparents. Because I have been taught, and internalized, that education and pushing one's self to be better is life's greatest challenge. And helping others is life's greatest gift. That is who I am. My goal simply put, is to succeed so I can then use the fruits of my success to ensure others can succeed. Succeed so I can protect those that can not protect themselves. Succeed so that I can lead.

That is my Why. That is the secret strength that I take into this 1L year. That is the secret that will sustain me and force me to succeed. You see the truth is this is not about me, its bigger then me. I can fail myself, but I can not fail others, so I wont. So I am ready for tomorrow and what it brings.

I am 1L
I am
Marqus A Cole